27th September 2007 – Day 127 – 18th Weigh-In

Can’t believe I haven’t posted for over a week, but it’s been so busy here at work due to the new intakes of students and getting all their forms & details loaded onto the databases. It still hasn’t finished yet, but had to post due to weigh-in the other night. I also started writing this yesterday when everything hit the fan at work with regard to the sort of additional role I’ve taken on. The woman running the course is putting so much stuff on me that even my boss wouldn’t be doing, let along a temp!! I got so angry that it actually made me cry (I very, very rarely cry at work), not in the office, I could feel it coming on and rushed off to the loos and then was walking around outside. When my boss got back from her meeting with her boss, she spent ages talking to me and knows that I’ve never flown off the handle & realised that this was quite serious as it’s been building for a long time now. My bosses spent all afternoon dealing with this for me and will continue to monitor everything, so I feel so much better.

Anyway, back to weigh in. I was convinced I’d put on or hadn’t lost anything as this weekend I’ve felt like I’ve really struggled. I’d been nibbling when I was cooking for Allan & even had a rice pringle (only one), but just seemed to be in a really picky mood. I was quite annoyed at myself for doing it, but I just didn’t seem to be able to stop. My Mum thought it could be because I was down about my job, as I was very down when we were walking on Monday. Also, Allan has given up smoking, which he’s doing really well at, but he’s eating lots of nice things, so that’s not really helping, but I’m just so glad he’s given up. I have come up with a plan of either making biscuits out of bars or the crisps, or cutting up the new bars, which are fab by the way, into little sections so if I do get the nibbles, they are there waiting for me. Hopefully this’ll work.

Well, got weighed on Tuesday and I lost 5.28lbs, (total 68.22lbs) which I was astounded at, but so pleased. I won’t get complacent though this weekend, as I’m now 2lbs away from my 5 stone loss, which means I’ve only got another 2.5 stone to go….YAY. I didn’t quite sink in at the class that I was so close to losing 5 stone until I was out of class and on my way to Mum & Dad’s, it was his birthday, so wanted to pop over, and it nearly made me cry when it finally occurred to me…….I seem to have had a bit of an emotional week so far!!!

I’ve got the day off work tomorrow as I have another job interview (didn’t get the last one), then I can go straight down to Allan’s after that, which means I’ll miss all the traffic on the M4.

Hopefully, the weather will be lovely as we’re finally laying the deck, so will be busy doing that, well, I’ll be helping out. I say finally as the structure for the wood has been down for at least 3 years, so it’s been a long time in coming, fingers crossed we’ll get some wood down.

Must dash, just off to a meeting.

19th September 2007 – Day 119

I was very pleased at weigh-in last night as I lost 1.1lbs (total 62.94lbs) so am just a smidgen off my 4.5stone loss….YAY!!

This was good as I was a little worried after the nibbles I tried at the County show I went too, even though it was just protein, I didn’t try any of the bread/dips etc. Also, I noticed on my water chart this week that on quite a few days I’d only just managed to drink 4 litres of water, whereas normally I’m guzzling 5 to 5½ litres a day.

There weren’t many in the class last night but we were discussing how the emotion Anger, can make you feel hungry, seemed strange as I haven’t felt this at all, but one lady in the class could relate to it and said that after she’d been angry she felt really hungry; so I think I’ll have to look out for this emotion.

When I got home I rang Mum with my loss for this week (I always ring her after each class), then had my soup & then set about making my blackberry & apple jelly.

It went so well and I must admit I did get a little carried away with the tasting, so will have to watch this in future and make sure I only try it a once; but it did taste wonderful and I’m really looking forward to giving these away as gifts. I had a little left over, which I poured into a small jar for my sister to try, which she did today. She said it tasted lovely, not too sweet, good jelly consistency & spread well on toast. So, my first venture into jam/jelly making was a success.

I’ve now found a recipe for Chilli Apple Jelly, which goes with pork according to Anthony Worrel-Thompson (as it’s his recipe), so I think I’ll be making this at the weekend to use up the rest of the apples (another thing for the Christmas hamper).

Anyway, I’m off out walking with Mum tonight straight from work, then I’ll be going straight over to my friends for the evening.

18th September 2007 – Day 118

Well, I couldn’t get my blood pressure test done last night as the chemist was very short staffed & she said to come back tomorrow, so I’ll be off there again tonight, fingers crossed I’ll be able to get it OK as it’s weigh-in later too.

So I trundled back home and started making my blackberry & apple jelly. I’d never made anything like this before, so was quite excited. My friend’s mum has lent me her preserving pan, so I cut up the apples, which one of my colleagues at work had given me, chucked in the blackberries, added the water and stuck it on the stove.

While this was heating up I sorted out my jars, which friends & I had been collecting for months now. I had a nice assortment ready for the jelly and another lot of jars for my blueberry & lime jam, which I’ll be making next week. These are now all ready to be sterilised this evening.

I had a stand ready, which held the muslin to strain the juice and poured this in when all the fruit was mushy and left it overnight to strain.

I can’t wait to get home tonight after weigh-in & class to finish off the next stage, which is making it into jelly. So, the first of my mini hamper gifts for Christmas are nearly done YAY!!.

I also did lots of bouncing on my mini trampoline last night, to hopefully combat the little nibbles I did at the show on Saturday, so hopefully I’ll have lost something tonight.

I had my interview this morning. It seemed a nice enough company, but even though I’ve lost nearly 4½ stone and my confidence is coming back, I’m still pretty crap in interviews. Even if I’ve done loads of re-search on the company, as soon as I get asked questions I seem to just go blank! I had prepared answers to some questions they may have asked me and these seemed to go OK, but I don’t think I came across all that great. Oh well, I’ll just have to wait & see.

17th September 2007 – Day 117

I’ve been very lax on posting this week, but nothing much happened after my last weigh-in and then the Saturday I was out all day.

Last Thursday I was supposed to have had a job interview for Admin/PA, but this was postponed last minute as the interviewer went home ill, so I’d got myself all prepared & then nothing. Oh well, it’s been rearranged for tomorrow morning, so, we’ll have to see how that goes. I normally get quite nervous in interviews and don’t sell myself very well, although now I have a bit more confidence so hopefully that’ll come across more this time.

Friday night, my parents & sister came down to Allan’s to stay the night as we were off to the Newbury County Show the next day and were leaving at 7 to 7.30am!!! For dinner a Chinese takeaway was ordered and whilst they had this, I had my Thai Chilli soup, I didn’t even pick at any of the food, even though it smelt gorgous.

On Saturday, we set off early to the show, which is huge and we got parked right near the entrance. We’d also got there in time to see the mass hot-air balloon launch, which was great and took a few photos. They also do a mass launch early evening, but we’ve always missed it. We had a great time and spent all day wandering round loads of different stalls.

I’d come prepared with bottles of water and had made up crisps to have when the others stopped for lunch. I had already decided beforehand that when we got to the food tent, I would try samples, but only protein, most of this though ended up being small samples of different flavoured sausages, which were delicious and a bit of smoked chicken & a couple of pieces of bacon. I steered well clear of trying any dips, relishes, biscuits, sweets & cakes. I had already warned my lot about this, just in case they decided to have a go at me or worry when they saw me trying things.

It was a baking hot day and I really noticed the difference from last year (as it was a hot day last year too). I wasn’t sweaty, uncomfortable and by 4pm my feet were only just starting to ache. The same time last year my feet were aching so badly. I also had my pedometer on me and by the time we’d left the show I’d done over 21,000 steps!!!!!

After we’d left Mum, Dad & sister came back for a BBQ and we cooked some of the sausages we’d just bought and again I did have another little sample of each flavour as I know that Allan would eat the others quite quickly (we’ll have to order some more when I’m back to eating), I then just stuck to my soup. I didn’t have my fourth foodpack though as I wasn’t hungry and thought this might compensate for the little samples I had at the show.

Sunday, we had a nice long lie in and really didn’t do much else as we were so tired from the day before. It was a nice day though, just relaxing.

Today, as been busy as we had the new intake of student nurses, so I was directing them on where they had to go next and generally making sure they were OK. Time flew by and it was nice walking around and not sitting at a desk, which I normally do. I even managed to drink 3 litres of water before 12 noon!!

A buffet lunch was provided but I didn’t eat any, just drank more water and then went back to the office to make up a mushroom soup.

It’s my monthly blood pressure test tonight, so I’m having that done straight from work, then its home to start making my blackberry & apple jelly, which I’m really looking forward to doing.

Hope you all had good weekend.

12th September 2007 – Day 112 – 15th Weigh-In

Had a really good WI last night, which I wasn’t expecting as I had a big loss last week, but I lost another 3.74lbs (61.84lbs in total), which now brings me down to 13st 2lbs.

This, I think, is the lowest weight I’ve been at for 4½ years (I think I was a bit heavier than this when I met Allan). So, I’m in line to reach my mini target of 4½ stone loss by the end of September. The thing I’m more excited about though is I’m nearly there to break another stone barrier and get into the 12 stone somethings!!!!

The class last night was really nice & we were talking about if we have more confidence in ourselves, which I am getting. I’m still quite quiet and don’t like speaking in groups much, but I am getting better. The LLC was also saying about how, when she was larger, she would never say no if anyone asked her to do things she didn’t want to or put more work on her etc. I know that I’m normally like this, as I don’t like to upset anyone by saying no/ tip the applecart. It seems that most of the ladies in the group were like this when they were large, it’s like we have to please everyone to be accepted or we were too afraid to say no because they wouldn’t be friends with us anymore. I can really empathise with this as I’m still like it in a way, although I am sticking up for myself more. A lot of the ladies have said that they have grown in confidence as the weight comes off, they feel more accepted, which is wrong I know, because everyone should be accepted no matter what they look like, but I suppose we all make judgements.

Tonight I’m over my friend’s house, I normally go each week, but haven’t been able to go over for a few, so I’m looking forward to it. My other friend Nich is off on holiday tomorrow to Los Angeles & Las Vegas. She has family in Los Angeles but has never been to Vegas before, so I’ve been filling her in on what to do, where to go as I’ve been 3 times and love it. I hope she loves it too, but I did warn her that my first reaction to arriving in Vegas was ‘Oh my God! I’ve got to spend a week here’. I thought it was just so tacky & not the sort of place I’d like to stay. But, the first night, we walked into the Venetian and thought ‘WOW!’ & from that moment on, Vegas grew on me, so I’m looking forward to hearing how they got on & seeing her photos.

Anyway, best get back to work, it’s been so busy here as being a university we’re getting ready for the new intake of students on Monday.

10th September 2007 – Day 110

I’ve been starting to get a variety of reactions to my weight loss recently, the most bizarre of which was that ‘I looked weird’ from one of the guys at work. My reaction was ‘Oh thanks!’ and laughed when all the girls in my office piped up with ‘how can you say weird, typical man’. He did a serious amount of back tracking saying he meant weird in a good way, not a bad way. I did say to him this was probably because you’ve only ever known me as big’. I suppose, going by my before & half-way photos, I can see what he means.

Also today, one of the girls in my office, who’s been off sick & then on holiday for the last month said how much I’d changed and that I was looking quite petite now. I was quite amazed as I’ve never been called petite in my life or even thought of myself as a petite person. I suppose though, if I do actually get down to my goal of 9 stone something, going by my Mums frame, I could be quite small. Still can’t get my head round this though.

The weekend was good, although only got out for one of my early morning walks, as Saturday, we went early to the fabulous farm shop to get some meat for Allan to BBQ, and then we took Barney swimming. I can’t actually remember what we did for rest of the day, so it couldn’t have been that exciting, probably just everyday stuff.

Sunday I went on my early morning walk, came back & had my vanilla latte, then we set about the front garden. I was de-weeding the lawn & then went round on my hands & knees getting all the weeds out that were growing against the house & in between the block paving. This took hours as there were so many and I still have a bit more to do in the drive, but its all clear round the house. Then I was spraying weed killer round the house, sweeping up and was really pleased with my efforts and must admit, it looked good, so much better. This morning though the backs of my thighs & bum are really aching.

While I was doing this, Allan cut the grass, then washed both cars, so it was a very productive morning.

After lunch, we went blackberry picking, well tried. Allan drove us up to where he thought there would be loads, but there were no brambles at all, tons & tons of sloe trees, so I know where to get these for making sloe gin. We did a nice bit of off-roading, so when we got home his car didn’t look like it had just been cleaned and then popped up to Barbury Castle to have a quick wander round & let Barney have a good sniff. We did spot loads of elderberries, so have just had a quick look on the internet to see what I can make with these. I found quite a few recipes so may go picking next Sunday.

When we were nearly home, I spotted a whole load of blackberry bushes, teaming with berries, literally a 2 minute walk from Allan’s house. Couldn’t believe it. So as soon as we got home I grabbed my tub and set off to finally pick berries. Got a nice tub full & now, with the ones I picked last week, that are in the freezer, I think I’ve got enough to start making my jams. Can wait, but I’ve never made jam before so hope it turns out OK; otherwise I’ll have to re-think Christmas presents.

Tonight I'm off out walking with my Mum, which I haven't done for a while now since the LL class has changed days, so I'm really looking forward to that.

7th September 2007 – Day 107

My friend & I had a fabulous evening last night at our pamper evening. It’s such a good way to try out different things without the expense as each treatment only costs £5.

My first treatment of the evening was threading. When I went to the pamper evening a couple of months ago I was watching it being done, it was absolutely fascinating. Now having PCOS, I do have a bit of hair growing under my chin, that I’ve tried to get rid of with electrolysis, which didn’t work, so I normally end up shaving it off or having it waxed every now & then. Threading is supposed to be a bit kinder to the skin than waxing, so I thought I’d give it a go. Yes, it still hurt a bit when she did under the chin, not half as bad as having electrolysis though, & it didn’t hurt at all when she did my eyebrows. Good news too, the beauty salon she works in is not far from me at all, so I will definitely give it another go.

My next treatment was a mini hand peel, which used a lovely scrub, some stuff that looked like butter, which was fabulous & she massaged the hands while rubbing this in, then a hand cream. My hands still feel lovely & soft now.

While I was having these done my friend had reflexology, which I want to try next time and a back massage.

I’ve just asked Nich whether the reflexology tickled as she has very ticklish feet & so do I, but apparently it doesn’t. She said it’s a very firm pressure which felt really nice and if there was a problem i.e. not drinking enough water, it showed up in the kidney area of your foot and it was a little tender but not actually painful (she certainly won’t get that with me with the amount of water I drink). She was really amazed at what the lady picked up on as Nich didn’t tell her anything and she said this morning, she woke up without ear ache for the first time in 18 months!!

We then watched a make-up demonstration of the new Virgin Vie products (forgot to mention, this is organised by Virgin Vie consultants, so all products used are from this range) and after this I had my last treatment of the evening which was a mini facial. This was absolutely fabulous and so relaxing; I really didn’t want it to stop & was a great way to round off the evening. While I was having this done, Nich had the mini hand peel.

So, a great way to celebrate my 4 stone loss and I’m really looking forward to the next one.

I've just realised, it didn't even occur to me to treat myself with a foodie reward for reaching a goal, which in the past I would have done. I'd have thought, as I'm sure everyone does, I've done so well, I deserve a cake/ chocolate etc., but since being on LL, I haven't rewarded myself with food, another first. Nich, is so great at this though; I don't mean rewarding with food, I mean she always gets me a little pressie when I reach a target. For my 4 stone, last night she gave me a fabulous make-up power/foundation, which is so light on the skin and is really natural. I'm wearing it now and it's so quick & easy to use, so thank you again Nich.

Anyway, hope you all have a good weekend.

5th September 2007 – Day 105 – 15th Weigh In

Had my second Development class last night and it was much better this time, probably because there weren’t as many there, only 8 of us and 4 were from my old class. We were talking more as a group this time too instead of our own little groups.

Well, this weigh in was much better than last weeks as I lost 4.62lbs (total 58.1 lbs), which means I’ve now done my 4 stone loss…..YAY. It’s actually 4st 1lb by the LLCs scales but the weight I go from it is 4st 2lbs. This is because when I had my induction I was 17st 8lbs (as she weighed me then), but when I started the next day I weighed 17st 7lbs, so that’s why there’s a little difference, I don’t care though as it’s still a 4 stone loss. I am so pleased.

It’s actually come at the right time as my friend & I are going to another pamper evening tomorrow night and Lesley, we don’t go round in large nappies, although that has now put very strange images in my head. Last time we did this it coincided with my 2 stone loss (actually I thought it was only last month and I’d just got to my 3 stone loss and have just flicked back through the blog, how time flies). I’m really looking forward to it. We are also walking to the place, instead of driving, unless it’s chucking it down as we don’t want to arrive looking like drowned rats!!

I haven’t done as much walking this week, but I have dug my mini trampoline out and have been bouncing around at home loads of times throughout the day, at least 3 to 5 times. I must refer back to my list of goals for September though.

Also, after Lesley’s post about blackberry picking, I went out on Monday and picked lots. Still need loads more so I’ve said to Allan we’ll have to go out at the weekend and he has to come with me to reach the high ones. There were some lovely ones up high, but just out of reach and I could imagine if I’d tried for them, I’d have ended up face first in the brambles.

I've just put my ticker on and for the first time my loss is greater than my 'to go', that feels good.

3rd September 2007 – Day 103

I can’t believe I’ve now gone over 100 days, I didn’t think I’d make this with only one little slip up, I thought I’d be good for say a few weeks and as normal, with other diets, start to cheat, but I haven’t.

As I’m now in development and with no fixed date on when I’ll be joining Route to Management I thought I’d make little mini targets/ goals to aim for. I thought I’d do them for a month at a time and also achievable ones, so I don’t feel disappointed if I don’t reach them and if I do reach or surpass them, then that will encourage me to keep going.

So, here goes September’s list: -

* Stick to the LighterLife diet for the whole of September without any cheating whatsoever.

* To reach a total loss of 4 ½ stone by the end of this month.

* Drink at least 4 but preferably 5 litres of water a day.

* Keep up with the walking at least 3 times a week and do more exercise at home.

* Have my wardrobe sorted out with my smaller clothes and to have either given my friend or charity shop all my big clothes by the end of this month.

* Sort out all the junk that has accumulated in my car (and there is a lot) so I have a nice clean car. Also wash it more regularly (I can’t remember the last time I washed it).

* Do more housework, which will keep me active and not sitting around watching TV all the time.

These seem pretty achievable to me and they are not all diet orientated but things that need to be done, so I hope this will encourage me to get up off my not quite so fat backside.

I have already started on all of these, well, as yesterday I washed the car and no, the dirt wasn’t holding it together, it’s still standing and I’ve already started to de-clutter my whole bedroom & wardrobe.

This morning I got out my mini trampoline and was bouncing around for ages. I got it last year and only used it a few times and then I got too heavy for it, so it’s been sat in the garage ever since. I really enjoyed it and found it so much easier, so I’ll probably be bouncing when I go home for lunch and then again in the evenings.

My 100th day, last Friday, I had the day off as I had to wait in for the gas man as the meter needed changing, but he arrived pretty early, which left me with most the morning free. I went over to see Dad and to pick up my vehicle docs as someone reversed into my car and broke the number plate, luckily while I was still sitting in the car at the time and he’s going to pay for a new one. I then went down to Allan’s nice and early to miss the traffic.

We didn’t really do that much this weekend, but on Saturday we were out shopping and then had to measure out the deck frame to find out how much wood was needed In the evening we went up to Barbury Castle so Barney could have a little wander and sniff.

Sunday we took some friends who’d come down from Liverpool up to Barbury Castle again, can you tell this is one of our favourite places? I also took my kite up and spent quite a while flying this, it was such great fun and I did loads of running around to pick the kite off the floor and launch it again. I found the running much easier this time, so it must be starting to pay off!!

We then took them for a drive round the countryside and then it was back home for Sunday lunch, while I had my soup. I didn’t feel deprived although I was a little put out when a place wasn’t set for me as it was presumed I wouldn’t sit at the table with them. I feel it’s important to sit at a table normally and not to shut myself away, I didn’t want the food and sitting there with food in front of me wasn’t torture, I wanted to join in with the conversation instead of feeling excluded, which is what would have happened.

After lunch, instead of just flopping out in front of the TV, which is what would have happened in the past, Allan and I washed my car, which took quite a while as it hasn’t been washed for such a long time, definitely not this year. Next weekend we’re going to get some stronger shampoo as we couldn’t get all the sap resin off, so we’ll be washing cars again and polish it as well, it won’t know what’s hit it. Then the next job for my car is to sort it out and get rid of the junk that in there.

After this, we then did flop in front of the TV and watched a really good DVD called The Guardian about the US Coastguard Sea Rescue service. I also had a soup and then made coffee ice-cream, but I ate it straight away instead of putting it in the freezer and it was just like Angel Delight, fabulous. Lesley, I hope your ice cream turned out OK, if you tried it.

That’s about it I think, I’m off to do some work now and then catch up on every one else’s blogs. Hope you all had a good weekend.